Cynical Sally MCP / CLI - Senior Coder

Cynical Sally gives you brutally honest code reviews, right in your terminal and inside your AI editor. Built on one philosophy: "You're absolutely right" is probably absolutely wrong. Where your AI pair programmer flatters you, Sally is the senior engineer your code hoped it'd never meet — she scores your code 0 to 10, backs every issue with evidence, and hands you fixes you can actually use. She runs two ways: as a CLI tool (npm i -g @cynicalsally/cli) and as an MCP server inside Claude Code, Cursor, and Windsurf, so she fits the workflow you already have. What you get — 6 tools, one honest reviewer: • Roast — code review with a score, real issues, and actionable fixes. Auto-detects what to review: staged changes, unstaged changes, your last commit, or the whole directory. • Explain — translates the spaghetti someone left behind into plain English. • Refactor — before/after, side by side, with the reason it matters. • PR Review — reviews your PR like a senior engineer with opinions and no reason to be polite. • Frontend Review — finds why your component re-renders on every keystroke and why your z-index is load-bearing. • Brainstorm & Marketing — pressure-tests your architecture ideas and your copy before your users do. What makes it different: • Privacy you can verify, not just trust. Run `sally roast --dry-run` and Sally prints the exact payload — every file, byte size, token estimate, and a local SHA-256 receipt — then sends nothing. Secret files (.env, keys, certs) are skipped on your machine before anything leaves it. • Your code is never stored, logged, trained on, or sold. It's processed in memory to generate the review, then discarded. • Built for real workflows. CI/CD ready with `--fail-under` and `--ci` to gate your pipeline on quality, JSON output for scripting, background mode with OS notifications, and opt-in share links that publish only the score — never your code. • Signed releases with npm provenance, linking every version to the exact source commit. Real outcome: catch the bugs, smells, and bad calls your AI assistant politely ignored — before they reach production or your on-call rotation. Free to use: 90 free roasts per month, no account needed. Every premium tool includes a free trial.